Fake it Till I Make it

I wrote this poem one night, not too long ago …

Yes, to those who know me (or think they do) I am the happy-go-lucky red head – or, as I say it, “the eternal optimist”. So it may come as a surprise to know that I have before, and do still now, deal with depression. I think we all do at one point or another … or in one form or another.

"All Alone"

For me, it used to be from years of emotional and verbal abuse that left me feeling worthless. It took a long time for me to overcome that – although there are times I am not so sure that I really have overcome it. Now, it is from constant pain and sickness wearing on my psyche. I try very hard to (as a friend stated) “fake it ’til I make it” and most of the time that is enough to keep me on the brighter side of life. But there are plenty of times that I feel incredibly alone.

I thought it was important to share this poem. Not only is it close to very my heart but I also know many people feel this way …

Oprah Winfrey said, “all we want in the world is to be seen, heard and acknowledged” and there are many times were we all feel incredibly insignificant.

All Alone
In a room filled with people
that I know are my friends
I still feel alone
the pain never ends
Trapped by my thoughts
alone in my pain
They all think I am fine
but my happiness is feigned
My heart feels broken
my soul is torn
I don’t know how much I can take
my spirit is so worn
I look around at my friends
but they haven’t a clue
I wish I could tell them
but what good would it do?
The emptiness I feel
has left me tired and cold
There are so many days
I want to give in and fold
But I keep up appearances
and fake my way through
I don’t know how to handle this
or who I can turn to
Just when I thought things were ok
the pain settles in
Just when I thought I could smile
I get uncomfortable in my skin
Some one please help me
take these feelings away
Help me to feel whole again
make my world less cold and gray

-Colleen With a Poem

[author] [author_image timthumb='on']http://chicswithaview.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/38919_409211579004_609929004_4730800_3921521_n.jpg[/author_image] [author_info]aka: @ColleenDavignon

Momma Bear to a whole bunch of comics, aspiring singer, poetry writer, and I have a whole bunch of jobs … I am one busy chick! http://comicsyndromefunny.com[/author_info] [/author]

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About Colleen

Poetry writer, blogger, administrative assistant, Talent Relations to Comic Syndrome, Mommabear to the comics & ETERNAL OPTIMIST.

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  1. Russ D
    November 4, 2011 at 5:20 pm

    Yet another powerful poem that is relateable and thought provoking

    • November 4, 2011 at 6:22 pm

      i agree!

  2. Lori Van Nostrand
    November 4, 2011 at 9:57 pm

    What your doing now, by expressing your self. Is wonderful therapy. To follow your bliss is too. I am impressed by your being able to share your very deep feelings. I am also moved. Your very good Colleen. Blessings

  3. November 5, 2011 at 3:12 am

    Beautiful poem, Colleen. Depression is so misunderstood. We all go through it to some degree or another, though for most of us it’s situational. I always say that when I first moved to Las Vegas, “I was so miserable, even Jesus would cross the street if he’d seen me coming.” Those who suffer from chronic depression truly suffer. I really feel for them. Good job in shedding some light on the topic from the perspective of someone who’s been there.

  4. Carlisle
    November 5, 2011 at 11:45 am

    Ooo Girl you need to keep writing! This is beautiful. Sad but true for so many.

  5. kim
    November 5, 2011 at 1:20 pm

    Been away for a bit and I just read your latest…fantastic Colleen….I think you are gaining a large following who look forward to your writing….keep it up!

  6. Janine
    November 9, 2011 at 9:46 am

    All your poems are incredible. Love and miss you

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